So I’m back up to date now with this post! Yay 🙂
This is a toughie. I guess realistically if I saw my ex I’d just say hi and be polite. However I’m guessing due to this being a writing challenge it’s supposed to be a little more in depth. So I decided to write it as if it was a letter. I have a few ex’s so it was hard to think who I would imaginary write it too. So instead I’ve combined it as if it was written to all 3.
It’s cliche I suppose but I’d like to say thank you. Without you guys I wouldn’t be where I am today or be the person I am today. Each one of you helped me on the grand journey I have taken to get this far.
If you hadn’t beat me I wouldn’t know how to stick up for myself. I wouldn’t realise my own self worth and I wouldn’t know the warning signs that have allowed me to get out of similar situations after we broke up. If you hadn’t cheated on me I wouldn’t have realised the tell tale signs when someone’s up to no good and I wouldn’t have realised that you were never worth my time. If you hadn’t mentally abused me and damaged my confidence I would never have learnt what it is to redevelop that confidence and become 100 times more feisty and attractive before. If I hadn’t lived with in that shitty flat and let you hurt and abuse me and cheat on me and watch you drink yourself silly and piss the bed and sell our possessions for drug money and cause us to get burgled and get threatened with bats and crowbars I would probably still be with you and had never had that final straw to see the light and get away.
I find it fairly amusing now that you tried to lie to me about your age and that at 35 you still think you’re some sort of player. Being with you was like studying or conducting an experiment. I could almost hear David Attenborough narrating your life ‘here comes the ageing, balding player thinking he’s still in the game’. I don’t blame you for taking your fun while you still could but you opened my eyes to the systems and games that people like you play. So I can thank you as well for your cheating and lying and game playing as it allowed me to recognise it in other people and know that they were the type I should avoid.
The best advice I can give you is not to put people on a pedestal. The complete opposite to the others you made me feel like a goddess and it was too much. To live up to your expectations, to allow myself to believe it was real, that your obsession and fascination were anything more than just that. The thing is on that pedestal I had a long way to fall and having your number 1 fan leave you to be with someone else is the biggest fall of all. But once I was up and I’d dusted myself off I realised that a relationship should be an equal partnership. I realised being worshipped is nothing if you don’t share common goals or interests. So I guess I can thank you to.
All the best